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Frostpunk (feat. The Stupendium)
Dan Bull
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"OK,hello.." Welcome to the Captain’s Quarters It’s all back in order I be getting healthy so i ordered my big mac with water Acting cautious On my ship you’re trapped, Andorra Getting in my way i leave em crushed like they a bag of walkers They acting Useless like reddit karma They lacking answers I’ll make em perish, like I’m Obama They crash like java I pull the llama I be grinding time in stardew valley So by now i think i’m qualified to be a farmer Never had a ciggy but smoking the competition They listen The only time i drop the mic is when i’m trippin Non-fiction, my blood is mythical Biblical, making miracles My brother caused a mother****ing flood when he was christened Look at all the people who watch me on every friday Look at all the rappers that copy my font and typeface They be getting bread i be getting Carbohydrates When they hear the beat then they be ducking like a sidechain "Oh,good show,good show..." A lazy sunday sitting comfy in the country When suddenly the butler Humphrey comes to bug me The Captain wants some company in the club. Lovely jubbly You’ve heard of getting smashed? I’ll be getting Humpty Dumptied Every time I step up in the booth I’m supping on suds with a touch of vermouth Dunking my tongue in its russet-y hues Or some other subtly bubbly fluid Intricate mixture of pickling my innards And tickling my quill til'I suddenly spew Lyrical wizardry Spitting my musical missives like "Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo"! Climbing the drapes I’m going ape Raising the roof just like Shwabadi do 'Cause it’s the bear necessities to reap a little hulla-Baloo These chaps got the raps on tap The Cap, the Chairman and Douglby too There’s nothing to do but glug on a couple of rums and a lovely pineapple juice Nouveau riche trio here to stir some trouble One minute at the bar I’m already seeing doubles Or triples, quadruples, you know why they call them tipples? 'Cause I’m tipping back the spirits 'Til I’m filled up to the nipples My-- Rhyme schemes are convoluted Some are genius, some are stupid And as soon as you should hear them Your mind becomes polluted I’m the undisputed tycoon of high-falutin’ music Providing you with highly putrid views No time to mute it I’m just too quick I can’t just spit on the mic I leave it glistening Bright with slimy mucous Your wife still finds that I’m the cutest... And though my pride and hubris invites a looming crisis I regardless find the lark just far too amusing to quit I might lose a few quid, but I’ll recoup it By revealing my new trick It’s killing you with half a billiard cue stick I haven’t devised a method to monetise it really but fook it I just find gratuitous mindless violence soothing, therapeutic That’s half the fun, now pass the rum, I’d like a glass of some Lining up shots faster than a starting gun Slurping it so hard it’s like a harlot’s bum that’s farting cum Christ, what the **** have I just done..
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