Helen of Troy, PA

It was the first time we really took a chance
To view the world behind our fathers' backs
We left our parents playing rummy by the cottage porch light
And we were walking down to Helen's on that sweet summer night
And we flipped a coin to see who would have to knock
When she opened up her door and asked us in
That's right, she asked us in

Helen of Troy, Pennsylvania

She was twice the age of me and Tony
Brown-eyed, recently divorced and lonely
And we lied about our high school football team
Number one in the state because of Tony and me
And she sensed our awkwardness and unzipped her calico dress
And called us over to kiss her one at a time
One at a time, good god, boys

Helen of Troy, Pennsylvania

Well, we rocked to the drone of large mosquitoes
The rhythm of moths against drumhead screens
The syncopation of Frigidaire motor
With her bob-tailed cat looking at us real mean

Helen of Troy, Pennsylvania

She went to the kitchen to get us something to drink
And me and Tony, we washed ourselves in the bathroom sink
Doing the chicken neck, the high five, and the monkey noise
Glad to be happy, healthy, heterosexual boys
And we drank her herbal tea, Red Zinger
And good golly, Miss Molly, all the way home

Helen of Troy, Pennsylvania
Yeah
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah

Whoa, Helen of Troy, Pennsylvania